Living with fear.

I have wanted to start this blog for a while now, but one thing has kept me from it – fear.

Fear has shown up in many ways and it has made me believe all sorts of things to talk myself out of taking action. Once I began to recognize all of my excuses for not starting, I noticed a pattern of fear controlling me.

Art is so vulnerable. Not only showing your work, but also your thoughts, opinions and aspirations. It takes a lot of courage to believe that your life can be different from the norm and it takes even more to go at that vision whole-heartedly.

When fear shows up in the studio it is detrimental to both my business and my artistic process. I have been scared to honestly and openly talk about my artwork, to apply to calls and hear rejection, to share dreams of where I want to go next. Fear has warped my artistic process as well- the fear of ruining a painting, the fear of starting a new project, the fear of reaching for something bigger, something I have never done before.

Is this sounding exhausting yet? Because it feels exhausting. And chances are if you are an artist or a creative or a dreamer, you have probably felt all of these things too.

So, here is to facing that bullshit head on. Let’s identify fear for what it is – self-preservation and ego, and let’s throw it in the back seat. Fear isn’t driving around here anymore.

I want this blog to be a place where I can be vulnerable and connect with others. I want it to be a place of conversation and I also want it to challenge me. This is a place where I can put my ideas to action and hold myself accountable. It is a place where I can face my fears dead on and instead of giving in, I can do all the things I dream so much about doing.

I hope this can help anyone else who feels stuck or controlled by these feelings and be a place for people to connect through it all.